anyone can be punk rock

back and forth we ride,

making our way up and over the flames.

the purple sky hangs above,

and the moon is nowhere to be seen.

there's no chance we can follow flairs,

'cause everyone's out here looking out for their own.

ONLY IN DARKNESS CAN WE FIND TRUE LIGHT.

One Hundred

As our plane begins to accelerate down the runway
I get out of my seat to ask the attendant
“What are the chances that we’ll be taking off right now?”
“One hundred percent, go back to your seat”
“You mean, one in a hundred? I’m kind of waiting for someone. Drop me off here.”
Back at my room
A hundred pygmy kangaroos are falling from the ceiling
“There you are”

incentives

if school buses stopped for sundaes, kids would like going to school.

awesome cliques

"you guys are lame for sing-talking everything"

"well then you can forget about taking part in our agency for rating awesomeness"

"awesome level -5"

on my way home

could anyone have imagined this...?

these roads cuttin' through my city.

oh the bright lights.

birtle

too slow to fly south for the winter, these rare species have been spotted seeking shelter atop industrial chimneys.
my biggest challenge in all my years of pet detection,
but one thing is certain,
jeff goldblum does not play for the lakers.

"just make a left up there"

nerds say 'no.'

am i doing all the wrong things?

those kids are 100% brain damage.

you're talking like you've been inside me before.

manon

as we wake up, i’ll leave you all alone.
just like i planned to do if you ever came to town.

yeah, i can breathe underwater

but every once in a while, i'll still come up for air.

spiders in my mouth, spiders on your face

i checked my phone until six in the morning.

if i could take this back, i'd do it all the same. and that's what kills me.

i am the worst of all.

i will take the knife out of your side while you sleep.

i slipped.

i am the worst of all.

clunk

everything goes the way i want : ex. the car crash.

gnarly actions

you tell me i can have any girl in this room,
i tell you that i only want you.
you kiss me,
but don’t look convinced.
you kiss me again and again and turn away.

“can you hear me?”

3/5ths of pbs

at marcello's in streetsville

seedlings

we sat like house plants
watered down and staring out of windows
stretching for the light to give us a sign of hope.

we've waited all winter
to move out in the summer
into a basket full of holes.

so we can be filled up
shined on
drained
and replaced
by the next seedlings staring out of windows.

fingerbang

friend #1 : "as my grandma always used to say : fingers away from the alcohol..."

friend #2 : "did your grandma only have one finger?!"

yeti projects

peace be still


war crimes


warsaw uprising


black presidents


werewolf/vampire


small talk

sweet dreams

lying in bed with my computer screen open.
so i can type in my sleep.
all of the things i see and sometimes hear.
like her face in my head telling me she's going to break my fucking hands if i leave.

the phone rings.

"hi, are you sleeping?" you said
"yuuuh i'm so tired i'm going to go back to sleep so i can write about my dreams as they come," i said
"but i wanna listen to you sleep," you said

i tried counting sheep but ended up faking zz's and snoring for half an hour

"sweet dreams," you said

before the tone of the telephone reminded me that i wasn't talking to anyone.

cut the foreplay

how many babies do you want from me anyways?

two...? four...? six...? eight...?

golden oldies

download:

Milano (Acoustic).mp3

Mango Company/Basically Chocolate Bread (Acoustic).mp3

fuck you

"this used to be my trademark back in the day."

but times have changed and now youtube videos do the thinking for me.

sucubus

i don't care if you're a ten, you can't make me put my tongue there.

the zafiro danté

i drove three hours in a stolen mini van to show this to you.
chased by an angry korean dad out of the costco parking lot.
passionately, sped through red lights in a snow squall,
just to do this with you.
our favourite dance.
you remember, the one that starts off slow and wistful like the rumba,
but leads to dangerous contorting sexual intercourse on the dance floor?
that's the one.

but why the fuck is it snowing in april?

7D

pre-mid-life crisis

"man i feel drained, musically. i need to get away from everything. i should have a picnic."

"a picnic?"

"that would make me inspired, to take my girlfriend on a nice sunny day and go out for a picnic on the country side, and get drunk. that would be so gangsta."

"how could a picnic with your girlfriend be gangsta?"

"i make anything sound gangsta, o.g. picnic. i'm gonna go eat some poppycock."

casting call

i'm currently holding open auditions for the new pantene commercial,
being shot in a large bubble bath.
anyone interested must be comfortable bearing skin.
wardrobe consists of bubbles and foam.
inquire within.